Bachelor finale night

Relaxing on my couch, typing this in between commercials is the perfect way to end this day. I had the day off and got a good amount accomplished. I found out I'm NOT going blind and my eyes are healthy. I also found out I have one leg 1/4 inch longer- the reason for my chronic back pain, luckily I found a chiropractor to work out my kinks.
Getting adjusted today took a weight off my shoulders. I have been so stressed/frustrated with work that exercise could only fix it so much. I came to realize I was eating like crap to help with the rest of my stress. I decided to try an called "my fitness pal" to start counting my food intake. I've learned I'm not eating enough protein and carbs, however it says I'm consuming too much sugar. I would have to disagree because it is all natural sugar from fruit, no desserts.
According to this app I will with 135 lbs if I keep exercising and eating the way I am in just 5 weeks. That's a 10 lb weight loss. It's hard for a overweight person to loose 10 lbs in a month! I have never worried about the scale, however I haven't weighed that amount since high school. I also know the chances to get that slim are impossible because I am lifting twice as much as I'm doing cardio.
Every time I live by myself I look forward to learning something new about myself. It's been a hard 10 months in Iowa and I've been frustrated because I've gone in and out of happiness. It's hard being away from family and friends, it's hard working a stressful job. I often wonder what I'm doing here and what I'll get out of this. I know professionally it was a smart move, but emotionally...
I had that ah ha moment the other night with my friend daphne. She is such an inspiration to me and like I've said before he introduced me to Tasha. These two women are going to be the ones that give me what I've been looking for this stage of my life- CONFIDENCE. It's not that I hate my body, I just know what I find attractive and what I think the person I am going to end up with would find attractive. I know physical attraction isn't everything, but it is A LOT. If I'm not confident I am not able to put myself out there in a relationship.
A second thing I've learned is that alcohol isn't everything. Once I hit college I began to drink heavily. When I would drink I'd drink to the point of blacking out. I did things I regret the next day. I was the party girl, and that is what my friends expect of me. When I went home before thanksgiving I met up with my college friends an they were worried about me for the reason I wasn't drinking that night.
Drinking isn't fun anymore. I love hour beer tastes, And i love that giddy feeling, however I don't love the headaches and being nauseous and sleeping like crap.
My journey in Iowa is to get me healthy and to get my confidence back. I need confidence not just for personal satisfaction and not just or a relationship, but also for work. I found it interesting to hear my boss say he wished I had more confidence.

So daphne and Tasha, thank you for making me realize my reason for Iowa.
I'm getting buff, healthy, and happy!

It's been awhile

I am so behind on this but tomorrow ill catch you all up. Still pushing strong!
Things to talk about:
Fitness competition
Tracking food
My ass starting to take shape

I need summer

It's been snowing here for 3 days now. I'm moving somewhere warm where I can run outside all winter long. The snow and cold wants to make me hibernate

Day 7, 8, and 9

Work is stressing me out and exercise is my only exit.
I met with Tasha and only cow she kicked my ass. My legs have been shaking all day. My ass is throbbing.
Going to try to walk through this pain tomorrow.

Day 5 and 6

I made it to the gym last night after an insane Saturday! I did legs and a little cardio even though at work I had to do the receiving and got a upper body workout in. After a long day and workout I broke a cardinal rule- I went in the tanning bed. I haven't been in one on at least 5 years. Something about those warm bulbs hitting my skin before bearing the cold running out to my car sounded amazing! And it was worth all 9 minutes.
Last night dinner was great had me a pork chop, broccoli and some MAC.
I think my late dinner and working out so late in the evening kept me up all night. I was super exhausted and super crabby today. Pushed through my Hump day, did some grocery shopping so I could make yummy Indian food tonight and avoided the gym. I decided instead to go in a 45 min walk with my dog Gibney. It was beautiful out and 35 degrees felt super warm! I avoided going out with friends tonight, even though I was bored out if my mind and decided to lay low and hit the sack early.
Back at the gym tomorrow, ill prob take Tuesday off all together bc everyone needs a rest day then Tasha is going to kick my butt again in Wed AM
Super pumped and still going strong!

By the way ...

I finished off the pop tarts today. Yikes! Luna bars here I come!

Day 4

Today was my day off from exercise. I worked a weird mid shift an have to head back in at 6 am. I'm exhausted and I'm going to head to golds after work tomorrow!! Still in it to win it!

Day 3

Well we got snowed in again, but I still made it to the gym! I am so sore, everything hurts- when I sneeze, when I go up stairs when I sit down. I love that feeling! If things went hurting then I wasn't working my muscles. Today was a shorter workout, I did some arms and the stair climber, but it got me sweating.
I was super lazy today besides that, and when I'm lazy i eat! Foursome reason the last tie I was at target I was craving these Oreo pop tarts, prob BC daphne feed me one last week, anyway I can't quit eating them. I know they are horrible for you! I'm going to try and sub them out for Luna bars at least!

Sprinters body vs distance runners body

Both these women have amazing bodies, and I know the time it took to create them. Two different athletes, too different bodies- which is better?
I did a Few ports growing up, started gymnastics at the age of 3 then moved on to diving and finally Track! Track was always my favorite sport. I think one thing I loved about track was how it was judged, whoever crosses the line first. Where as gymnastics and diving are someone's personal opinion who the judges think is best.
When I did gymnastics I was solid muscle and transitioning into distance running I couldn't keep the muscle on. I would loose so much weight I looked sick. While on the track I'd watch the sprinters and would notice how different their muscles are developed.
Personal opinion I want the sprinters body! Which means cutting back on the cardio and upping the weights. Trisha has her work cut out for her and so do I!

Day 2

I'm proud of myself today. I worked 11.5 hours and almost talked myself out of going to the gym, however I thought to myself if we get this snow storm like they are saying I won't want to leave my house at all tomorrow. It's not the fact of me wanting to be lazy after work its the fact that I have a dog and I feel so bad having her locked up for so long. Things will be so much easier when it's warm out, I'll want to be outside with her, running her, taking her to the park, however I think she doesn't even want to be out there right now either. When I got up this AM it was 1 degree outside and they said it felt like -11. So once I come home from a long day you can see why I don't care to go back out.
On these long days at work I tend not to eat enough, I missed my lunch, and all I could think of was writing down what my carb and protein intake was and I probably didn't have enough fuel to even make it through a run. I did my grocery shopping after work and bought everything I thought would have good amounts of protein, except for chicken- I'm not fond of its texture: cashews, peanut butter, cottage cheese, pork....
I got home, took my dog out, cooked myself dinner and thought ill close my eyes for an hour and when my alarm goes off ill get up and head to the gym. I started thinking of all these excuses I made and told myself its DAY 2, if I'm making excuses now I just waisted $400.
So I did just that. I went in thinking 40 min of cardio and ill feel better. Besides the fact the man next to me on the treadmill had high amounts of cologne on I had my headphones in and ended up doing 50 min!
Some people hate the treadmill however I'm used to coaches yelling at me and for some reason when I look at the distance I ran or my MPH it pushes me, I just have to get in the zone of people watching an having the right music to run along with.

I'm not going to give up on this I deserve it to myself to exercise especially after a long hard work day.

Day 1

400 dollars later I embarked on a journey that will last at least 10 weeks. I signed up for 10 personal training sessions with a trainer named Tasha. Tasha and her husband own a little personal training facility that my friend Daphne introduced me too. This place is perfect! One on one sessions with a woman who has competed in multiple body building competitions. She isn't the only one there with this experience, every trainer is in perfect shape! I'm so excited for this and to pick their brains in how to achieve the perfect body. Competing in a show is decently on my bucket list, and maybe being around all these great trainers will get me in the mindset to set a date!
Measurements were taken, body fold testing was done and come to find out I have 15% body fat-which is good.  Thinking in my head I felt so week or someone who has been active their whole life, she said "girl  you've got some great genes this is going to be great," so I told her to kick my ass. I was up for a challenge and there is no feeling more awarding than pushing yourself so hard the muscles are shaking, and that exactly what happened. The weight routine I did with her was a complete body workout, even though I didn't step on a treadmill in those 45 min my heart acted as though I ran a cross country race.
As I left my first workout with Tasha I left with a sense of accomplishment, and a sense of how out of shape I am! I think I fit in he "skinny fat" category. We made our next appointment, she gave me workout   goals until then and shouted go "eat some carbs and protein now."
I'm ready to start forming the perfect body.